People are trying anything as constipation remedies. One man thought sticking an eel up his butt would work, while a group of parents created a Facebook group titled ““Parents Against Miralax.” MiraLAX is a laxative solution that increases the amount of water in the intestinal tract to stimulate bowel movements. Parents are claiming the ingredient PEG 3350 is causing neuro-psychiatric problems in their children. PEG is an active ingredient that is typically used during colonoscopy or barium enema X-rays to draw water into the colon in order to flush out any excess. By creation it does add much needed liquid to create smooth bowel movement, but there is a cost.
Food and Drug Administration (FDA) results showed that MiraLAX contains small amounts of ethylene glycol and diethylene glycol — two chemicals derived from PEG 3350. According to the Center for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC), ethylene glycol “is chemically broken down in the body into toxic compounds. It and its toxic byproducts first affect the central nervous system (CNS), then the heart, and finally the kidneys.” In relation to diethylene glycol, the CDC states:
The substance may cause effects on the kidneys, resulting in kidney impairment. The substance may cause effects on the central nervous system and liver by ingestion. Exposure by ingestion may result in death.
It should be no surprise that Bayer is the brains behind MiraLAX. And it should also be no surprise that Bayer’s response supports “the safety of long- and short-term safety of PEG 3350 in pediatric patients,” though the company acknowledged the product is not labeled for use in the pediatric population.
Although using an eel is natural in a sense, it’s not going to get the job done long- term. Overcoming constipation can be resolved by keeping your body properly hydrated and most importantly with one simple trick.
The truth is I am not a patient person when it comes to pooping, and I have always been mildly fascinated by people who spend 20 minutes on the shitter, wondering what the hell they are doing in there! When I poop it’s over in a matter of minutes, two at the most. Unless of course I just can’t poop at all. In which case I suffer for a while, giving it my best effort, and then just call it “constipation quits.” Those days are miserable; I feel so bloated that I refuse to eat simply because I don’t want to keep putting food in when nothing is coming out.
When it’s really bad, three to four days go by until finally I squeak out some poop. And let’s not forget the pain and suffering involved with straining and pushing. Yet despite the hopeful urge, my trips to the bathroom deposit nothing more than what looks like a small handful of Raisinettes into the bowl! After a while when I’m worn down and the desire to poop is too intense, I put some extra time and muscle into it. I try constipation remedies like drinking extra liters of water, throwing some MiraLAX into the mix, revving up my Magnesium intake to eight 500mg capsules a day, and going for a long run.
Truth is, sometimes my bowels just won’t budge even with all of these remedies. This last bout left me with bulging hemorrhoids, bloody stools, and the need for daily Prep-H suppositories. I know TMI. But if you’re still reading this you know exactly what I’m talking about.
Constipation Remedies: The Squatty Potty
So you can imagine my surprise when my friend told me to close my eyes and placed a big box on my lap for my birthday. When she asked, “Do you have any idea what it is?” I can assure you I did not. It was my very own Squatty Potty. I was so excited to get home and assemble it.
Why A Squatty Potty?
In nature, humans squat to eliminate. This position allows our bowels to line up perfectly for the poop to come out easily. A sitting position forces the colon to kink, so the poop can’t get out easily. Most people don’t eliminate fully, causing toxicity, constipation, and hemorrhoids. The squatty potty is basically a platform that you place a few inches in front of your toilet whereupon you rest your feet while you sit down on the porcelain throne. The nice thing about the Squatty Potty is it’s designed to fit around your toilet; so when it’s not in use it’s out of the way.
By bringing your feet higher and closer to your butt, you assume a “squat-like” position, which is the ideal position for optimal elimination.
Constipation Remedies: This Is The Only One You Need
And now I have my own. Almost instant constipation relief. After each great release I thought, “Maybe it’s just a coincidence — we’ll see how the next one goes.” But effortless poop after effortless poop, I finally had to accept that squatting like millions of people did, and millions still do in most of the Third World today, has major benefits. One of them is constipation relief.
I thought of my trips to Southeast Asia where all of the toilets are nothing more than ceramic holes in the ground with foot markers on either side for you to place your feet. Squatting was the only option and in fact 1.2 billion people still squat today because they don’t have toilets. Not only that but there is now tons of research to support that squat-pooping is actually beneficial to your health! But don’t take my word for it. Be your own judge. I mean after all, what do you have to lose besides your hemorrhoids … Just Saying.
Signed yours truly,
Jamie Weiss is a writer.
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